The Security Myth…

March 10, 2011

 

On January 26, 2011 I received notice that my job was being eliminated along with 74 others.  I had just been downsized.

At first I panicked, which is a normal reaction.  I am a single mom, after all.  What was I going to do?  How was I going to support my family?  What would become of us all in this depressed economy?  For the first week I cried, I prayed, I had massive anxiety issues.  I couldn’t sleep.

Panic is my nature.  Worry is, too.  I am highly emotional, and by my nature I go to these places when things happen.  Then I get very “busy.”  Which I did by going to the local job center and getting paperwork and information going before they even had a chance to schedule anything for all of us at my workplace.  I signed up for a class on Shipbuilding. I had my resume finished and my Linked-In profile updated and started stockpiling toilet paper on sale.

 Then the most amazing thing happened.  While down with a migraine, I had hours on end to think.  I allowed my brain to wander, and it did something that surprised me…it opened up to possibilities.  I started to dream again. I asked myself “what if?”  And it was SO EXCITING! 

In the aftermath of my divorce, I gave up the dreams I had in order to provide for my family.  I was too busy seeking some form of security from the outside world to dream anymore.  I needed a salary.  Benefits.  Stability.  Security.

 But guess what?  For a while I had the salary, benefits, stability, and what I thought was security.  But it really wasn’t security, because I had no way of knowing my company would be sold.  So it was a false security that I bought into for awhile.  Realizing this was a real a-ha! moment for me.  There is no such thing as earthly security! 

 Wow – what a revelation that was to me, and how freeing it was!  It opened the floodgates to ideas and dreams and plans that have obviously been stuffed down inside of me for far too long, things I’d given up on because they didn’t offer the security I thought I needed.

Why was I so willing to look for security in strangers instead of in myself?  Who has more at stake than me to provide for me and my family?  I know my responsibilities and the capabilities I have…who better to trust my children and myself to?

So I’m going to trust in myself and go with my dreams.  I don’t know what the future holds or how things will work out.  But I do trust God, and I know He put these dreams inside of me for a reason.  He will work with me and through me.  I have a chance to finally live the life I want to live, on my terms, in my own way.  What I thought was a disaster could be the biggest opportunity of my life.

 I’m putting my money on me.

Image from http://www.colectiva.tv/wordpress/lang/en-us/2008/08/
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Personalizing my new home

October 28, 2009

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I have a new home…well, an office…O.K, it’s a cubicle.  But it’s not just any cubicle, it’s MY cubicle at my wonderful new job. 

 I think this job is perfect for me.  I’m in Marketing, which is all about coming up with ideas to sell the brands that are assigned to me.  I have to also take products and come up with new ways to sell the same things I’m already selling.  It’s about freshness and newness and requires creativity.

 Here’s the problem.  I’m very visual, and cubicles are very…well…square.  Gray.  Impersonal.  Boring.

 So I am on a one-woman campaign to change that!  It involves shopping, which is once again one of my favorite things to do…yea!

 The first thing I did was tack up a bunch of things to make it useful like phone listings and instructions.  Then a calendar.  Of course the absolutely necessary photos of my children were a priority!

 I have also gone to a favorite new store called Trends and Traditions in town and picked up some adorable things:  a pretty painted canvas with a motivational saying…a huge chick-art mousepad about chocolate…fun magnets for the fronts of my metal (gray) shelves. 

 I’m home!

 Today’s purchase made me laugh out loud at the store.  I almost didn’t buy it because I didn’t want to show my true colors so new to the job (J), but I think anything that can make you laugh like that needs to be around to inspire me!  It is an adorable collaged piece that says “deadlines amuse me.”  Ha!  I’m going to take a photo of it to post with this article, because I think it will make you smile, too!

 Don’t settle for mediocre surroundings.  Even if it’s just attractive ads from magazines, liven up your space!  Bring something that makes you smile!

 And add a small bowl of chocolate to your desk.  We can all use a little more of that.

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